Traffic jams, crowded subways, meeting the mortgage payment, troublesome teens, no time to relax, career frustrations-they’re all part of modern daily life. And any or all cause stress.
What is Stress?
Stress is not an event; it is your reaction to an event. When your body responds physically and mentally to uncomfortable external incidents, stress results.
Stress may also be generated by thoughts, feelings or expectations about things that are real or imagined. A phobia, for example, which is an exaggerated and sometimes illogical fear, can cause its sufferer as much stress as real danger. In addition, a series of small events, seemingly insignificant in themselves, may build up to bring on a stress reaction.
To put it simply, stress is the clash between demands in your life and the means you have to deal with those demands.
Is All Stress Bad?
No. Some stress can even be pleasant, such as the kind you experience when cheering on your favourite team. And many people do their best work under pressures. In fact, stress can be a potent force for personal development; when you have to do it, you learn to do it. This type of stress is known as positive stress.
Normally, a little stress is stimulating. But too much stress runs the body down. On the other hand, too little stress can also be harmful. The sudden inactivity which follows retirement from a demanding job can be very stressful unless new interests are discovered.
Recognize Your Stress Symptoms
When you are under too much stress, your body lets you know by sending out warning signs. These can be physical, emotional or behavioural.
Physical symptoms take the form of headaches, high blood pressure, chest pain, fatigue or eyestrain. Some emotional signs are depression, irritability, low self-esteem, anger, and apathy. Behavioural indicators may be overeating or under eating, an increase in smoking or drinking, forgetfulness, insomnia, and careless driving.
Of course these are not the only signs. There are many more. But if you have found yourself experiencing some of the previously-named symptoms with increasing frequency, you are probably becoming a victim of stress.
Managing Stress – An A-B-C
A is for ACTION.
When stress is created by something you can control, take ACTION to change things. Many people cite too much to do, with too little time to do it, as their greatest cause of stress. Here are five time-management topics that can help:
- Make lists. It’s easier to do a job when you remind yourself about it by writing it down.
- Prioritize. Do important jobs first, when your energy is high.
- Combine similar tasks. Make all phone calls in one sitting. Run all errands in one trip.
- Avoid time-wasters. Postpone chit-chat until you have “downtime.”
- Delegate. Can’t co-workers, children, spouse or friends take some of the load?
B is for BEAR IT.
If there’s nothing you can do, you’ll just have to “grin and BEAR IT.”
Learn to master your thoughts and impulses even if, at first, you can’t control your feelings. When anger threatens, count to 10, or 20. Recite the multiplication tables. Memorize a poem. Change your thoughts, then later, once you’ve calmed down, analyze the problem objectively. Don’t allow yourself to be drawn into reacting emotionally.
Keep things in perspective. Don’t overdramatize. Sometimes the words we use to describe our stressful situations are emotionally charged and can worsen the way we feel. Saying that one’s workload is “killing” them or that one’s children are driving one to “pull their hair out” are examples of how we often overdramatize.
Self-talk is a technique many people use to handle stress. They repeat a saying that helps them accept and deal with stressful situations. Here are some common ones:
- One day I’ll laugh about this.
- It’s a learning experience.
- This is just one more chapter for my book.
Don’t forget, a sense of humour and a positive attitude are guaranteed stress reducers. If you avoid taking things overly seriously, and can focus on the positive side, you’re already on the road to finding a solution to your situation.
C is for COPE.
And one of the best ways to COPE with stress is by using relaxation techniques.
Of course your body has a natural ability to relax, but often this ability diminishes with constant stress. For this reason, it may take practice before your body regains its natural ability.
Breathing deeply is the fastest and easiest way to relax. Here’s one method: Fold your hands together over your stomach. Now inhale and fill up the bottom of your lungs breathings from your abdomen, not your chest. Inhale to the count of four, then exhale slowly and focus on relaxing.
reeing up tension in muscle groups is another stress-reducer, and it can be combined with deep breathing as well. First, scan your body looking for tense muscle groups. Start with your feet and work up through your legs until you reach your neck and head. At each place you feel tension, take a full breath and imagine the tightness “dissolving” as you exhale.
Auto suggestion is a third key to relaxation. Allow random thoughts to pass through your mind without paying any attention to them. Then, begin to repeat things like the following to yourself:
“I fell relaxed and calm.”
“My hands are warm and heavy.”
“My heartbeat is slow and regular.”
I’ll keep this post short, but right now I have steam coming out of my ears.